Your best networking accessory ever...

You made me LOOK! !  Thanks for the good info! 

Happy 4th to you and your family!

~Jenn

Let me guess............a SMILE.
Now I will go read what you shared Terry.

Want to know what you can read from a smile?

1. If it is forced - the polite smile.
2. If the person is an objective listener
3. If they tend to put a positive or negative spin on what they hear.
4. If they are reserved and cautious
5. If they generally out front with their feelings.
6. If they are exaggerating the smile - (Miley Sirus) does this gummy smile for the camera almost always.

Next time any of you see me.........I will be glad to demonstrate theses for you.

If it is not a smile....................SORRY for going off topic...LOL

The Face Reader, Lin

HI Terry.

Loved the blog........   I was right.

I have an additional insight that I would like to share from a face reading perspective. When we attend a networking event or any event for that matter, every adult is a composite of their life experiences. I do not believe that you can get to adulthood without experiencing REJECTION.

A warm genuine smile can be a welcome beacon that offsets are fear of approaching a new person. Don't most businesses hang a sign signaling they are ready to do business with you, often in red neon to make sure we see it.

Think of your smile as the welcome sign that says "I would love the opportunity to do business with you"

My 2 cents, Lin 

That is a great analogy Lin... I am definately quicker to aproach those with the "open" smile than those without... and isn't that what your there for (networking) ... to be aproached and to aproach?

- Keith

Hi Keith:

I agree.............I consider a smile as the best "Open for business sign" every created!

Great read, Terry. Being that I'm new to the networking scene, your blog post was very insightful. Thanks!

Lin - thanks for the smile comments.  We teach that here, and even in a (supposedly) non-threatening environment like our training center, smiles are STILL forgotten.

Keep in mind, people see in you exactly what you see in them.  If someone doesn't seem approachable, and you make that judgement based on their facial expressions, if your facial expressions are similar, people will think you are unapproachable as well.

Profound, I know.

-MB

Lin - Just wondering. And, this is probably an unusual question.

What are your thoughts and ideas on practicing smiling.

Mary Beth, Terry, Keith are all great smilers
Did you all practice, or does it just come natural.

If you do practice. How?

Keep on smiling :.)

Sandy Barris
Business Marketing Services
248-335-8080

People can tell if you are smiling over the phone.  Many customer service people have a mirror in front of them next to the phone so that they will remember to smile when they answer the phone.

That smile is not just for face-to-face meetings, anymore.

Now i am off to see the wonderful Terry blog...

Let's be honest people - If you have to practice smiling that is pretty sad! You should love what your doing everyday enough to where smiling comes natural! Practice other things like brushing and flossing so your smile is always great lol ok... that was a bit much lol... but, smiling SHOULD come natural when networking, when selling, when doing what you do best - Being YOU at your profession!

-Keith

Sandy's question made me think.  I'm a natural-born smiler.  But I think my smiling tends to come naturally because of how I view myself and the world.  I tend to be happy, and to find the best in situations and in people.  I like people, and I'm endlessly fascinated by their stories.  (Makes me a good coach!)  I meet a stranger prepared to like them and to think they're great. 

And it doesn't hurt that I've got a really outgoing personality.  You could say that my smile is step one.  My willingness to just go up to a person or a group and start a conversation is step two.  I don't know that I can practice smiling itself (I think I'd look like Lin's forced, polite smile), but I do know that I can work on my point of view about the world and other people, and I DEFINITELY can work on just going up and starting a conversation with someone I don't (yet) know.

So even though I get just as nervous and shy around a bunch of people I don't know as you do, my ready smile lights the way, and my boisterous personality (?!) gets us talking - and then we're golden. 

The forced smile is obvious - practiced or not - and your voice changes when you are truly smiling. Try this little experiment:

Put your hand lightly over the area of your vocal cords and speak a few words - if you smile as you speak, you should feel a slight difference in the muscle action (I experience it as a widening of the musculature, you may feel something different), and notice that your vocal pitch is slightly higher as well.

I agree with all the recent posts on smiling. I believe in smiling and it is natural for me, I do believe in practice smiling also, sounds contradictory doesn't it????   Faces are my business and I often find that very warm and friendly people who are either so pre- occupied with the left brain aspects of the presentation or situation forget to smile. Often they actually scrunch their eyebrows together (which literally brings the eyes closer together to help focus) now they actually look like they are frowning. These people need to practice their presentation or force themselves to go to more networking events until they feel more comfortable and then their natural ability to smile will be visible to all. Until then they need to put on a smile and act as if, or stay home.   I can only imagine that there are days that Terry, Merrybeth, Keith and Charlie do not have a smile on their face. When we see them they are in the midst of what they love..............People, networking etc. If you are in a career that you continually have to decide to smile,  you are in the wrong business. When you are doing what you love ........the smile is automatic.   That said..........there is a facial trait we look for so see if the person habitually puts on a smile, even when they do not feel like it. Start looking for people who have a horizontal line in the space between the bottom of their nose and their upper lip.   In face reading we actually call this "Forced Smile" The longer the line and the deeper the line the more often the person puts on a smile no matter what they are feeling. I once worked a birthday party for a group of teenage girls (15-16 yrs old) who were all from very wealthy families and attend out top private schools. 98% of them had forced smile lines, when normally I might see 2% at any particular event.   Choosing to be happy and choosing to smile is a great tool in networking, but more importantly for life. The Secret ...........states, what you send out into the universe, multiplies and comes back to you. I prefer happy smiling people.   Lin

Lin,

GREAT post.  I think the group will really benefit from those last thoughts.

-MB

Sorry for the delayed response. I am actually out of town right now, but wanted to weigh in on this.

Sandy, I don't know that you can practice a smile (outside of your mirror every day). Here's what I practice:

Loving life!

It's hard not to smile when you are happy. It's hard not to be happy when you love your life.

I have a saying: Love the moments you live and you will live the moments you love!

Sure you can catch me not smiling, but I guarentee you will never do that for five straight minutes. I believe life is made up of nothing more than the moments that you live. When people say they have a bad day, I automatically assume that out of the 1440 minutes each day has, they spent more minutes upset than happy.  WHY WOULD ANYONE DO THAT????

As people we may not control the events that transpire in our lives (you do control a lot of them) but you absolutely control how you respond to those events, EVERY TIME. So many people react. I encourage you to do your best to always respond.

People like being around those they perceive as positive and happy. It's even better when that perception turns into reality.

Glad to see this discussion has gotten new life and hopefully it's brought a smile to a few more faces.

Back to vacation for me ;-)